WHAT NOT TO WEAR (WHEN GARDENING IN UMBRIA)
Where’s the “What not to Wear” police when you need them? Just off the plane and into the Umbrian countryside, I toss on my cherry-patterned apron over my *new/old, gauzy, flowered culottes as I decide to check out the vegetable garden. In addition to the surprise of the 4’ towers of lettuce and radicchio—this is what happens when nobody picks at the right moment—I am excited at my first encounter with fava beans and sweet peas ready to be gobbled. (This, by the way, is the same formerly baby-sized radicchio around which I had been enthusiastically making rock frames over the March vacation.) As I inspect everything more closely—especially the insect kingdom in action—I notice loud buZZing around me that suggests that I, myself, am of intense interest to some killer-sized fauna. I wonder, “Why are they so attracted to me?” When I looked down at my fruity, flowery get-up, I had to laugh:they must be mistaking me for lunch! Trinny and Susannah would ne...